I think I may have a drinking problem.
There, I said it.
I have been fighting against this for a few months, maybe even a year or so, but I have come to accept that I have a problem with alcohol.
My problem is …
Gah, it hurts me to write it. Let me just check there is no one about, shut the door, type quietly . . .
The problem is – I don’t really enjoy being drunk anymore.
There. I said it.
Take last night for example. We had our neighbours over. Mr G went out to get supplies – cider, a box of wine (we succumbed to buying boxes rather than bottles when we realised it was so much more fun not knowing where the end was. Drinking bottles is rather like having punctuation in your evening – once you reach the end you feel it’s sensible to stop instead of opening another bottle for just one more).
We settled down with our opening drinks when my friend said that they had had a hell of a week and just wanted to go for it. So I started mixing cocktails – I make a wicked Mudslide! Mr Neighbour is not usually a big spirit drinker but he was necking back cocktails like there was no tomorrow. It must have been a really shitty week for him.
Usually I’m the first one there with my straw ready to mix my spirits. My new favourite is Peach Schnapps and Lilt! What a gorgeous, refreshing, beach inspired cocktail. But last night I just kept thinking about the pile of work waiting for me to do today.
This from the girl who once went drinking till 3 am before turning up for work as a lifeguard at 5 am for a full shift! I knew there was a problem then when I walked into the Leisure Centre and aimed for the staffroom on the right, but ended up in the (closed) cafe on the left! I warn you now, if the lifeguards in your local pool are students, chances are they are standing up purely due to the wall they are holding on to!
Recently though I’ve noticed that when I’ve had a skinful I just don’t sleep that well. I wake up through the night with stomach pains, bloating. My legs cramp, my shoulders ache. It’s as if my entire body spends the whole night’s sleep as tense as possible in anticipation of the smack-me-down headache that’s coming up with the rise of the sun! I just don’t enjoy hangovers anymore.
OK – I know not many people love their hangovers. But it used to be a chance to curl up on the sofa with chocolate, tea and watch movies all day – like a self-induced sick day but with a feeling of accomplishment. A lot of the fun of a hangover was taken away when the kids were born – they just didn’t get that changing nappies and doing feeds at 7 am is not fun with a hangover.
So yeah, I admit it. I have got up today with 3 kids, the neighbours child having crashed out here last night while her parents staggered home. I have put the night’s destruction away, the dishwasher is going, I have a coffee and I have sat down to work. I feel OK- and I am happy that I had a good night without the hangover in the morning. Clearly there is something wrong with me. I have a drinking problem. I just don’t know what the cure is yet!
(I know what you could be thinking. You might suggest, imply or submit that this is age related. It is not. I warn you. Do not go there!)