Enough is enough

I asked the other day when it was ok to stop trying with a relationship, be it with a friend, family or a partner.

After another week of wrestling with this question from a personal point of view, I have decided that this is it. The last stand. The final gesture.

I have not made this decision lightly. I have tried valiantly for months to resurrect a friendship which has grown awkward and inelegant with time, frustration and inconsideration.

I do not for a second think this is one sided, that there is one person to blame, or at fault. I expect both sides in this spat feel as let down as the other. Who knows who threw the first spanner into the cog of our friendship, who was the first to feel dismissed by the other? As the years have gone by, so have numerous little digs and comments that rankled but were put aside, only now to be resurrected in the game of ‘she said, she said’.

However, the time has come to accept defeat. For now.

It is time to settle back, concentrate on other aspects of my life, other friendships old and new. Expand my horizons, branch out.

They say time is a healer. Maybe in time this rift will become repaired. But like a scab it is best to let it heal over rather than to pick at it.

Time out, time for a rest, time for a change.

There is a feeling of relief in making this decision. Sadness too, but relief in giving myself permission to stop feeling responsible. To stop trying.

So the gesture has been made. If it is taken up, then all is not lost.

But if it is not, then I will relax and know that I did at least try.

About Piper George

Wife, mother, puppy chaser extraordinaire. Freelance copy-writer and blogger! Life is full of opportunities - it's having the time to grab them that's hard.

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Comments

Enough is enough — 6 Comments

  1. Beautifully worded article Piper! I think it takes some guts to finally end a friendship/ relationship that you know is going nowhere. I have a hoarder’s mentality, even with relationships. I would rather stay in one and be complacent than actually do something to end it. Looking forward to your update on whether the gesture was reciprocated 🙂

  2. I did this not too long ago. It hurt a little, not going to lie. But at the same time; we get tired of being hurt and you are so right sometimes we have to realize something isn’t worth our getting hurt again or investing time in something the other person doesn’t care about anymore. I needed your post; it reminds me that I’ve done the right thing.

  3. I’ve had to hit the pause button on certain friendships as well. While it’s a difficult decision at the time, in retrospect, giving myself a “breather” was probably the best gift I could’ve received. Time heals some wounds but not always. For now, trust yourself and listen to the still small voice nudging you to step away from this friendship. You might be entering a new season of your life. One full of more hope and peace!

    • A pause does not have to be an end either. I have had a friendship stall for a couple of years before, the one time before I walked away and put myself first. Two years later it was better than ever. I definitely feel more relaxed this week 🙂

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